Lindsay Lohan: Leaked Playboy Nudes, Down $10k, And Threatening To F***ing Kill Someone

Good ol' Lindsay Lohan. She's spectacularly hapless isn't she? You could leave her on an infinitely smooth surface, devoid of any life and, somehow, she'd still end up getting arrested with illegal articles about her person.

She's a godsend for pondscum like us.

And now, tremendously, she's threatening to kill people and missing $10,000 from a Chanel purse because, no matter how hard she tries, she simply can't avoid melodrama and vague trouble. Still, at least we can all gawp at her leaked Playboy nudes, right?

See, LiLo was left irked after her purse got pinched. In leaked audio footage, the Mean Girls actress (we have to keep saying 'Mean Girls star' because she's really done nothing of note since then) can be heard spitting that she'll "f**king kill someone" if it means she has to go back to jail.

Basically, her passport, some documents and ID was swiped in her hideously expensive bag, which meant that she wouldn't have been able to get back to Los Angeles in time for her next court date.

That could've meant a judge sending her to the slammer.

During the clip obtained by TMZ, Lindsay can be heard saying:

"This is not good. I will f**king kill someone if I even have to get questioned."

Alas, her bag was eventually recovered along with her documents. Smartly, whoever stole the bag managed to keep a tidy $10,000 for themselves. Nice job Thiefo.

And while all this was going on, the rest of the world was ogling LiLo's leaked Playboy nudes, which marvellously means that no-one needs to buy a copy now.

Who wants to buy actual magazines these days when you have brilliant sites like this to yoink all the good stuff for you, eh?

Have a look. And no, they are totally not safe to view at work. Or NSFW if you've been skim reading.

Images found here. They have more photographs too. Go sue them if you have a problem. Thanks.