Hugh Hefner’s Son Charged With Assaulting A Playmate With A Great Rack

Remember when we told you that Hugh Hefner's son – Marston Hefner – had been roughing up a Playmate by the name of Claire Sinclair? Weird that someone who grew up in the Playboy Mansion should objectify a woman isn't it?

We totally told you, you forgetful bozo.

Well, Marston Hefner is not only a man who realises that there isn't a first name that sounds good before the surname 'Hefner', but he's also a man who has officially been charged with assaulting his (presumably former) girlfriend, who was a Playmate of the Year. Prison anyone?

That's right! Marston faces over a year in jail according to the Pasadena City Attorney. That said, domestic violence is pretty chic these days, as proven by Chris Brown and Rihanna, so he'll probably get to sweep some streets for a while before making a new career out of it.

A rep for the Pasadena City Attorney's office tells TMZ that Marston was charged yesterday with one count of inflicting corporal injury on a spouse or cohabitant.

WAIT! It gets far worse than punching a woman with great boobs.

We hear that Marston has also been charged with vandalism. What kind? The unspeakably awful crime of (allegedly) damaging Claire's laptop during the heated argument.

DAMAGING SOMEONE'S LAPTOP?! That is bang out of order. All her passwords, Spotify accounts, photos and saucy screengrabs are on there! HOW COULD HE?

If convicted on both counts, Marston faces a year-and-a-half behind bars.

Still, that's nothing if you believe the rumours that Hugh Hef gave a bunch of people Legionnaires Disease. Bruises heal, but Legionnaires Disease? Well… that's… we actually don't know what it means but it sounds pretty bad doesn't it? It probably makes you soil yourself and go yellow or something.