Demi Moore Still Obviously Insane: She Wants Ashton Kutcher Back

If you've been keeping an eye on Demi Moore, then you'll agree that she's looked pretty unhinged since Bruce Willis left her engineering miracle of an arse. Dead behind the eyes, motionless face and of course, willingly humping Ashton Kutcher.

Recently, she had a breakdown of sorts and went to rehab after taking some recreationals in the fallout of Kutch having sex with a young woman in a hot tub. On his wedding anniversary to Demi.

So, while no-one really cares whether Moore pulls out of this funk, we have to show vague, condescending concern about her because that's what gossip rags are supposed to do. The honest among you will be tickled pink at the notion that she's still completely fucking insane thanks to the rumour that she is gulpingly desperate to get Ashton back. Drugs eh?

According to those close to Demi Moore, but not close enough to keep their mouths shut when someone offers them money for tittle tattle, Demi continues to carry a torch for her estranged husband.

In fact, rumours suggest that she's got an actual torch and has drawn a little face on it so she can shine it against a wall and talk to it like Kutcher is still with her.

At some point, she'll realise that you can't make love to a shadow. Until then, she'll keep thinking she's having sex with a shadow.

Drugs eh?

There's a small problem in all this. The Two and a Half Men deadbeat has made it clear to everyone (including Moore) that he's moved on. Notably, he's moved on (or in) with writer Lorene Scafaria.

Both Moore ex-husband Bruce Willis and the former couple's daughter Rumer have tried to convince Demi she needs to realize Kutcher "isn't coming back. That's a fact," said a longtime friend of the actress. "She has to come to terms with that, as difficult as that is for her."

Next week: Handfuls of shit.