The news has been breaking steadily all week and now, in possibly the last piece of breaking breaking news, Whitney Houston is unequivocally dead. We dug her up from her grave in New Jersey and she looked absolutely, definitely dead.
Of course, many of you will have seen the performances of the stars at her televised funeral over the weekend which lasted roughly 30 hours. Alicia Keys was on hand to grunt down a mic and show a bit of her bra off, which was nice.
But alas, Whitney Houston remained as dead as she was when she died in the bathtub last week. No matter how many stories appear in the press, Whitney Houston only gets deader.
And now, after a brief private ceremony in New Jersey, Whitney Houston has been laid to rest for what seems to be the last time.
Even though Whitney is still very much a cadaver, fans and onlookers gathered along the route the motorcade took from the Newark funeral home to the cemetery about 20 miles away in Westfield, where Houston is now buried next to her father.
Reports just coming through are saying that both plots definitely contain dead bodies and that newsrooms are now considering looking elsewhere for news as, rather selfishly, corpses don't make great news and give lousy soundbites about the afterlife.
Apparently, Kevin Coster is still delivering his eulogy to Whitney Houston in an empty church, unaware that everyone packed up and left on Saturday.
Meanwhile, some fans ran alongside the hearse as it began the journey to Houston's grave site with some yelling "we love you, Whitney", but sadly, dead ears can't hear.
And so, for now at least, everyone slowly pulls a cover over Whitney Houston.
Well, until some toxicology report gets released or Bobby Brown decides he wants to open up about it all to a news channel with a big cheque book.
For now though, it really does seem like Whitney Houston has died for the last time.
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